Friday, June 4, 2010

Expired



He Zhiwu, Cop 223: We split up on April Fool's Day. So I decided to let the joke run for a month. Every day I buy a can of pineapple with a sell-by date of May 1. May loves pineapple, and May 1 is my birthday. If May hasn't changed her mind by the time I've bought thirty cans, then our love will also expire.
He Zhiwu, Cop 223: Any canned pineapple that expires on May 1?
Cashier: You know what day it is today?
He Zhiwu, Cop 223: April 30?
Cashier: Right. You think we sell outdated stock?
He Zhiwu, Cop 223: There's still two hours to go.
Cashier: Nobody would buy it. Get a fresh one.
He Zhiwu, Cop 223: People like you are hung up on freshness. You realize what goes into a can of pineapple? The fruit must be grown, harvested, sliced, and you just throw it away! How do you think the can feels about that?
Cashier: Buddy, I only work here. Who cares about how the cans feel? What about how I feel? Loading, more loading, unloading... How I wish cans wouldn't expire! It'd save me loads of work. You like expired cans? Help yourself! As many as you like! On the house!
He Zhiwu, Cop 223: Do you... like pineapple?

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